Ceremonial Traditions and Rituals

Unity Candle Rituals 

Unity Sand Rituals
Jump The Broom Ritual

Celtic Handfasting - One and Six Cord Rituals
Celtic Anam Cara & Pebble Ritual

Celtic Blessing Stone Ritual

Celtic Oathing Stone Ritual

Celtic Loving Cup Ritual
Native American Wedding Vase Ritual

Loving Cup & Wine Ceremony Ritual

Ceremony of the Rose Ritual
The Lasso Ceremony (Hispanic & Filipino Tradition) Ritual 
Honor Your Mother Ceremony Ritual

Water Ritual

Native American Salt Ritual
Breaking Bread Ritual
Garland and Lei Ritual
Circling Ritual
Truce Bell Ritual

Unity Candle Ceremony

The lighting of the Unity Candle is a ritual that symbolizes the union that exists between a man and a woman who enter into marriage. It is a popular tradition for both religious and non-religious ceremonies because it can easily be added to any wedding, it is non-denominational in origin, and it does not have any religious significance.

 

A Unity Candle set consists of two white taper candles and a large center Unity Candle.  The two tapers symbolize the couple's prior individual unique lives and families; the Unity Candle symbolizes the union that is created when a man and a woman enter into marriage.

 

The Ceremony usually follows the exchange of vows and rings.  At the beginning of the ceremony, the Officiant says a few words about the union that is created; the couple then takes their respective tapers and lights the Unity Candle.

 

Alternative ideas:

The couple may blow out their own taper or blow our each other's candles to symbolize the closing of their individual lives and the beginning of their new life as wife and husband.  An alternative way to perform the ceremony is to allow the two taper candles to continue to burn to symbolize the Bride and Groom acceptance of each other individuality.

 

A couple with children may include the children from a previous marriage in the ceremony by lighting their candles and having them join in to light the Unity Candle together.  

 

Additionally, A couple may include all the wedding guests in the ceremony by giving them a small candle when they arrive. Prior to lighting the Unity Candle, the couple shares the flame from their tapers with the guest seated on the first row on their side of the isle.  Each guest then shares the flame from their candle with the person sitting next to them until all the candles are lit.  The couple then lights their Unity Candle and are pronounced wife and husband. The officiant may suggest that everyone make a good wish for the bride and groom and blow out the candles.

 

A couple may choose to have soft music playing during the Unity Candle Ceremony. 

Unity Candle Tradition #1

Officiant says: The lighting of the Unity Candle symbolizes the union that exists between a man and a woman who enter into marriage. The two smaller candles represent their individual lives.  Every experience you ever had, everything you have ever done, and everything you have ever learned have brought you to this moment. The center candle represents the new life and home they are establishing today.  As ______ and ______ joint together in lighting this Unity Candle, may we all reflect on the union made here this day between this woman and this man.  From this moment on, the light of your love burns jointly as you walk down life’s pathway together. May the path of life become brighter as the flame of your love grows stronger.

 

Unity Candle Tradition #2

Officiant says:  "___________ and ___________, the two lighted candles symbolize your separate lives, your separate families and your separate sets of friends. I ask that you each take one candle and that together you light the center candle. The individual candies represent your individual lives before today. Lighting the center candle represents that your two lives are now joined into one single light which represents the joining together of your two families and sets of friends to one."

If Children Are Involved
"The lighting of the center candle represents not only the union of __________ and ________ in marriage, but the unity formed in this new family in which your lives will now shine as one family. (Or, if you are blending two families: "As you light your candles, and the flames become one, let this signify the blending of two families."

Unity Candle Tradition #3
Officiant says: Every human being possesses a special light that burns within them. When two spirits, destined to be together, find each other, their streams of light flow together, and a single brighter light, goes forth from their union. __________ and ________ , by committing to one another today, you kindle the light within each other, and promise to do your best to always see that light within each other, to nurture and tens that flame in your partner as best you can, especially in difficult times, when this may be hardest to do.

Bride _______, take this candle as a symbol of your spirit, and Groom _______, take this candle as a symbol of your spirit. Now joining your individual flames together, light the center candle which symbolizes the spirit of your union and the new greater flame of your marriage. As you do so, silently vow to tend the spirit of this union, and never forget that just as this union is made stronger by your strength as individuals, so are you as individuals made stronger by this union.

Optional Blessing:

May the blessing of light, Be with you always, Light without and light within. And may the sun shine upon you and warm your heart Until it glows Like a great fire, So that others may feel The warmth of your love For one another.

 

Memorial Candle

A large pillar candle on the table with the Guest Book or at the entrance to the ceremony.  It can be lit before the guests arrive and placed with a small card in front of it that reads "In Memory of _______".  At the beginning of the ceremony, the officiant explains the  "Memorial" candle by saying:  ________ may not be physically here with us today, but they are looking down on us and are here in spirit to bless this union. ______  and _______ (Bride and/or Groom) has lit a candle at the entrance in memory of ________.  Alternatively, one or more colored pillar candle(s), can be placed on the altar or table on either side of the Unity Candles.  The officiant explains the memorial candles while _______ and ______ (Bride and/or Groom) light the memorial candles using their tapers; they then return to their positions in front of the Officiant. Additionally, a poem or reading dedicated to the "absent" person can be placed in the ceremony program.

Unity Sand Ceremony

The Unity Sand Ceremony has controversial origins; some people believe that it originated with Native Americans while others believe that it originated in Hawaii.  Whatever its origin, the couple ceremoniously pours various colors of sand from individual containers (seashells, glass vessels, or other distinctive containers) into one special container to symbolize the coming together of two lives into one. Some couples prefer to leave a small amount of sand in their respective container to show that even though they now united as one, they remain individuals.  Couples may write their own vows for the ceremony, however, passages from ancient Hawaiian or Native American weddings can easily be found on the Internet.  The Sand Ceremony can be altered by giving various colors of sand to the children of the couple or to family members and friends thus creating a colorful symbol of unity.  Additionally, wedding members may add a special wish or blessing for the couple as they add their sand to the couple's sand.

Sand Ceremony #1 for Couple Only
(The Officiant says): (Groom) ___________ and (Bride) __________
today you are making a commitment to share the rest of your lives with each other. Your relationship is symbolized through the pouring together of these two individual containers of sand. (Groom) __________, through the sands of time you have grown into the person you are today. This container of sand represents all that you were, all that you are, and all that you will ever be. (Bride) ___________, through the sands of time you have grown into the person you are today. This container of sand represents all that you were, all that you are, and all that you will ever be. As you each hold your separate container of sand, it symbolizes your lives prior to this moment; individual and unique. Now as you blend the sands together, it symbolizes the blending together of your two hands, two hearts, and two lives into one.

(The Bride and Groom combine their sands into the Unity Sand Bottle) Just as these grains of sand can never be separated again, so may your lives be blended together for all eternity.

Sand Ceremony #2 for Couple and Children
(The Officiant says): (Groom) ___________, (Bride) _________, and (Children) _____ and ________ today you are making a commitment to share the rest of your lives with each other. Your new family relationship is symbolized through the pouring together of these individual containers of sand. One represents you, (Groom) ________, and all that you are as husband and father. One represents you, (Bride) _________ and all that you are as wife and mother. The other container(s) represent(s) (Children) _____ and ______ who make(s) this family complete. As you each hold your separate container of sand, it symbolizes your lives before today.  As you blend the sands together, it symbolizes the blending together of your hands, your hearts, and your lives into one family.

 

(The Groom, Bride, and Children combine their sands into the Unity Sand Bottle.) Just as these grains of sand can never be separated again, so may your lives be blended together for all eternity.

Jumping The Broom Ceremony - African Tradition

Jumping the broom is a ritual that goes back in time to the ancestral roots African Americans who wanted to honor their unions when they could not afford to legally marry.  This ritual symbolizes the sweeping away of old former single lives, past problems, and previous cares.  Jumping the broom symbolizes the crossing of a threshold and the leaping of faith into a new relationship.

During the ceremony after pronouncement, the Officiant says: Starting a new life with another person requires a "leap of faith.” This broom represents a threshold. ____&_____, although still individuals, will begin a new life together. Jumping over the broom represents crossing this threshold into new territory; a life vitally connected to another's. They leave behind the past and jump into the future together secure in their love. The leap they take over the broom is also symbolic.   By taking the leap, they make a gesture of dedication to working together through the tough times ahead, as well as the easy times. Please count with me now and shout with joy as they perform their first act of working together as husband and wife: 1, 2, 3, jump! ~ Hurray!!

Celtic Handfasting Ritual

If you are planning a Celtic, Renaissance, or medieval style wedding, Handfasting is a great ritual to add to your traditional ceremony and vows. Handfasting was traditionally a very simple ceremony in which the bride and groom faced each other and joined right hand to right hand and left hand to left hand and were bound by a ceremonial wrap or rope. In Scotland the cloth was usually a piece of the groom's family tartan. The expression of "tying the knot" came from this early Celtic marriage ritual.

The Handfasting Ceremony is a popular tradition for both religious and non-religious ceremonies because it can easily be added to any wedding, it is non-denominational in origin, it does not have any religious significance, and it can easily be customized to fit your needs and desires. There are many variations to Handfasting ceremonies. Some couples use just one single cord made of silk, rope, ribbon, a clan's tartan or some other material, while other couples use multiple cords. The ritual can be held in the beginning of the wedding ceremony or it can be held at the end following the exchange of vows and rings.  At the beginning of the ritual, the Officiant may explain the history and significance of the Handfasting tradition and says a few words about the union that is being created.  The Officiant then ties the couple's hands together with the material in a "love knot" to signify the joining of their lives in marriage. A couple may write their own words for the tradition, however, passages from other weddings can easily be found on the Internet.  Please go to the Sample Ceremony page to see samples of Celtic Handfasting ceremonies.

Celtic Six Cord Handfasting Ritual

Know that before you go further, since your lives have crossed in this life, you have formed ties between each other. As you seek to enter into this state of matrimony, you should strive to make real the ideals which give meaning to both this ceremony and the institution of marriage.

With full awareness, know that within this circle, you are not only declaring your intent to be hand fasted before your friends and family, but that you speak that intent also to your higher powers.  The promises made today, and the ties that are bound here, greatly strengthen your union; they will cross the years and lives of each soul's growth.

Consent
Do you still seek to enter into this ceremony? "yes we seek to enter"

Hand Fasting
I bid you look into each others eyes.
________ will you cause him/her pain? "I may".
Is that your intent? "No".
________ will you cause him/her pain? "I may".
Is that your intent? "No".
(to both) Will you share each other's pain and seek to ease it? "Yes".
And so the binding is made. Please join hands.
(First cord is draped across Grooms' or Brides' hands)

________ will you share his/her laughter? "Yes".
________ will you share his/her laughter? "Yes".
(to both) Will you both look for the brightness in life
and the positive in each other? "Yes".
And so the binding is made. (Second cord is draped)

________ will you burden him/her? "I may".
Is that your intent? "No".
________ will you burden him/her? "I may".
Is that your intent? "No".
(to both) Will you share the burdens of each
so that your spirits may grow in this union? "Yes".
And so, the binding is made. (Third cord is draped).

________ will you share his/her dreams? "Yes".
________ will you share his/her dreams? "Yes".
(to both) Will you dream together
to create new realities and hopes? "Yes".
And so this binding is made (fourth cord is draped).

________ will you cause his/her anger? "I may".
 Is that your intent? "No".
________ will you cause his/her anger? "I may".
Is that your intent?" No".
(to both) Will you take the heat of anger
and use it to temper the strength of this union? "We will".
And so this binding is made (fifth cord is draped).

________ will you honor him/her? "I will".
________ will you honor him/her? "I will".
(to both) Will you seek never to give cause
to break that honor? "We shall never do so".
And so this binding is made (drape sixth cord). (Cords are tied with three knots)

"The knots of this binding are not formed by these cords but instead by your vows. Either of you may drop the cords, for, as always, you hold in your own hands the making or breaking of this union".

Celtic One Cord Handfasting Ritual

The officiant holds the cord and says to the couple:  Please hold each other’s hands (palms up and her hands resting in his).

 ____________ and ____________ this cord is a symbol of the life
you have chosen to live together. Until this moment you have been separate in thought, word, and deed. But as this cord is tied together, so shall your lives become intertwined. With this cord, I bind you to the vows that you have made to one another. With this knot, I tie you heart to heart, together as one.

The Officiant wraps the cord loosely around the Grooms' or Brides' wrists to tie a "love knot".

 

Officiant says:  The knot of this binding is not bound by the cord, but rather, by your own vows of love.  For, as always, you have in your own hands the making or breaking of this union. May this "love knot" always be a reminder of the binding together of two hands, two hearts, and two souls into one. And so are you bound, each to the other, for all the days of your lives. 

 

Cord may then be removed and placed on the altar. Many couples choose to keep the "love knot" as a memento of their new union created that day.

Celtic Blessing Stone Ritual

In contemporary weddings, instead of throwing rice on a new couple to shower them with warm wishes for their future, many couples opt for birdseed, flower petals, bubbles, confetti and blessing stones.  The Blessing Stone Ritual is a perfect addition to any ceremony because it adds a special touch to your wedding, involves everybody in attendance, and is a wonderful way to unite family and friends in a simple but meaningful part of the ceremony.

Procedure:

Each guest gets a blessing stone as they arrive at the wedding ceremony. Usually at the beginning of the wedding ceremony, the officiant explains the significance of the blessing stone tradition and ask the guests to hold the stones during the wedding ceremony and infused or transfer their love, good wishes and heartfelt blessings for the couple to the stone.  The blessing stone ritual is uusually performed at the end of the wedding ceremony after the pronouncement. However, the ritual can be incorporated into a wedding or reception in anyway the couple feels is meaningful.  At some point during or after the ceremony or at the reception, the officiant says: “When you arrived, you were given a stone to hold in your hand during the wedding ceremony. ________ and _________ chose these stones as symbols of your special relationship, love, good wishes and heartfelt blessings to them and their beautiful family. The stones will serve as a lasting reminder of your presence at their wedding and of the special love that they shared on this their special day. As you hold the blessing stone tightly in your hand, please reflect for a moment your wishes for this couple for love, happiness, prosperity, and unity. Following the ceremony, ________ and _________ will invite you to toss the stones with your personal blessing for them as a newly married couple into the ocean/river (or place the stones in a special container).”  At the end of a beach ceremony, the guests are asked to move to the water's edge for the casting of the blessing stones. At non-beach wedding locations, the guests are asked to come forward and place their blessing stone in a special container of water.  Each person's wish or blessings can be silent or spoken aloud.  For small weddings, spoken blessings are appropriate; silent blessings are more appropriate for large or beach weddings. The bride and groom may share a blessing with each another, for their guests, or for loved ones who are deceased or could not be present. Blessing stones are also a unique way to involve children from prior marriages. The bride and groom can say a special blessing for the children, the children may offer a blessing for the new family, and they can place stones together in the water to symbolize their unity as a new family.

Additional ideas:

Place a bowl filled with Blessing Stones in an area where the guests enter and exit the seating area. When your guests arrive, have ushers or attendants give each guest a blessing stone when the guests are being seated.  Alternatively, a blessing stone can also be placed on each wedding chair before the guests arrive. 

At a beach wedding, guests can be asked to gather a stone along the shore for the tossing.  Stones can also be placed in special containers such as beach pails in the area where the tossing will take place. However, blessing stones do not have to be tossed into the water.  Instead, have the guest place the blessing stones into a bowl to serve as a keepsake and reminder of their special day! At a reception, a stone can be placed next to each place setting with a note explaining its purpose.

Have each guest write a special blessing or wish on cards attached to the stones; the cards can be left at a gift or sign in table.

Blessing stones can also be used as wedding favors.  They can be used paper weights for place cards and as wedding decorations by placing natural stones or decorative glass stones in clear glass vases or bowls which can be used as centerpieces and table decorations.  For a natural and thematic touch, large stones can be used to along walkways or other areas of the wedding.

Celtic Oathing Stone Ritual
In this tradition, the couple holds or puts their hands on a stone during their vows to "set them in stone."

Celtic Loving Cup Ritual

The use of the Celtic Loving Cup or wine cup at a wedding is an ancient tradition that has its roots in Scottish, Irish, French and Jewish cultures. By the 15th century it was common for the Celtic people to toast each other with a ceremonial Loving Cup. In Scotland this cup is known as a quaich, which comes from the Celtic word cuach, meaning cup.

Today there are different versions of the Loving Cup. The traditional quaich is shaped like a 2 handled bowl and often has an inlaid Celtic design. Loving Cups come in many designs, shapes, sizes and colors. Some couples choose use a crystal wine glass and have their names and the date of their wedding etched on it.

The purpose of the Celtic Loving  Cup ritual is for the bride and groom to share their first drink together as wife and husband, to toast their love, devotion, and friendship, and to show the coming together of two families.  Special words can be added to include the Bride and Groom's parents (and friends) as part of this ceremony. The cup is then passed down from generation to generation, ensuring happiness and good fortune to all who drink from it.

First Version for Couple Only

During the ritual, the Officiant says: "This wine goblet is known as the Celtic Unity Loving Cup.  The wine within it is symbolic of the "Cup of Life".  The years of life is like a cup of wine. This "Cup of Life" contains a wine with properties that are both are sweet and bitter.  The sweet properties of the wine are symbolic of happiness, joy, hope, peace, love and delight. The bitter properties of the wine are symbolic of disappointment, sorrow, grief, despair, and life’s trials and tribulations. Together the sweet and the bitter properties represent the full range of experiences that are a natural part of "Life's Journey."  (The Groom takes a sip of wine and then the Bride drinks form the cup and passes it back to Officiant).  The officiant says:  "May those who drink deeply from the "Cup of Life" with an open heart and willing spirit, invite the full range of challenges and experiences into their being."

Second Version for Couple, Family and GuestDuring the ceremony, the Officiant says:  "The years of life are as a cup of wine poured out for you to drink. This Loving Cup contains within it a wine with certain properties that are sweet and symbolic of happiness, joy, hope, peace, love and delight.

This same wine also holds some bitter properties that are symbolic of disappointment, sorrow, grief, despair, and life's trials and tribulations.  Together the sweet and the bitter represent "Love's Journey" and all of the experiences that are a natural part of it. For all who share the wine from this Loving Cup, so may you share all things from this day on with love and understanding. Those who drink deeply from the Loving Cup with an open heart and willing spirit, invite the full range of challenges and experiences into their being for themselves and the Bride and Groom.

Minister pours wine into the Loving Cup and holds it up and says:  This cup of wine is symbolic of the cup of life. As you all share the wine from the Loving Cup, you undertake to share all that the future may bring. It represents the blessings given and passed on to each participant in this ceremony. All the sweetness life's cup may hold for each of you will be the sweeter because you drink it together. Whatever drops of bitterness it may contain will be less bitter and the sweetness be be greater because you share them. Drink now, and may the cup of your lives be sweet and full to running over.

After family and friends have sipped wine from the Loving Cup, it is passed back to the officiant.

Officiant holds up the Loving Cup and says to the couple:  This Loving Cup is symbolic of the pledges you have made to one another to share together the fullness of life. As you drink from this cup, you acknowledge to one another that your lives, separate until this moment, have now become one.

Officiant hands the Loving Cup to Bride and Groom and says:  Now drink to the love you've shared in the past. The Bride and Groom sip from the Loving Cup.

Officiant says:  Drink to your love in the present, on this your wedding day. The Bride and Groom sip from the Loving Cup

Officiant says:  And drink to your love in the future and forever more! The Bride and Groom sip from the Loving Cup and hand it back to the Minister.

Officiant says:  As you have shared the wine from this Loving Cup, so may you share your lives. May you explore the mysteries of the Loving Cup and share in the reflection of love in one another's soul. From love all things proceed and unto love they must return.  May you find life's joys heightened, it's bitterness sweetened, and all of life enriched by God's blessings upon you (or. . . and all of life enriched by the love of family and friends).

The Lasso Ceremony (Hispanic & Filipino Tradition)  

This is a Hispanic and Filipino tradition where a lasso or rope is placed by the officiant around the bride and groom's shoulders in the form of an "8" (the infinity symbol) - after they have exchanged their vows to symbolize their everlasting union.  The couple wears the lasso throughout the remainder of the service.  The lasso can be made of rosary beads, white ribbon, orange flowers, fabric, silver, crystal or elaborately painted wood. It can also be placed around the couple's necks, or wrists. If you have children; they may also be included in the ceremony as they will be a part of the new family.

Honor Your Mother Ritual 

This is a ritual  to honor your mother, mother-in-laws, or close family members with flowers on the day of your wedding.  Simply have your florist add two extra red roses or other flowers to your bridal bouquet. As you walk down the isle, stop and present one rose or flower to your mother.  You may also give her a kiss and tell her how much you love her. When the ceremony is over, you can repeat this gesture with your mother-in-law.

Water Tradition
The couple pours different colored water into a single glass, creating a third color.

Native American Salt Tradition
The bride passes a handful of salt to her groom and he passes it back; this exchange is repeated three times. The bride then exchanges the salt with the groom's family to symbolize her becoming part of a family.

Breaking Bread Tradition
The bride and groom tear off pieces of bread and eat a piece. The bread can also be shared with family and friends to symbolize their future as a family.

Garland and Lei Tradition 
In Hawaiian weddings, Leis represent the love and respect for the unity of a new family and the person to whom you give it.  In this tradition, the bride and groom typically exchange leis, or the families may exchange leis with the couple.  In the Garland Tradition, the bride and groom exchange garlands of flowers to represents their new unity blessed by nature.  In Indian weddings, this tradition is called varmala or jaimala, and it represents a proposal by the bride and acceptance by the groom.

Circling Tradition
In Eastern European ceremonies, the bride and groom circle the altar three times to symbolize first steps together as husband and wife.  In Hindu ceremonies, couples circle a fire seven times to symbolize their unbroken commitment to each other and to seal their union.

Truce Bell Tradition
A bell is rung on the wedding day and then placed in their home.  During an argument, one of them can ring the truce bell to remind them of the happiness of their wedding day and to end the disagreement quickly.